Are there mistakes that can sabotage your sobriety? Absolutely! Among them, one stands out as particularly detrimental and surprisingly common. In this brief blog article, we’ll explore this critical error and its potentially devastating effects on your recovery journey. Let’s dive in and start on the path to lasting sobriety together!
Mistake or education?
Paradoxically, I want to suggest that there are no true mistakes. If you can learn from what you perceive as a mistake, then it becomes a valuable lesson, not a failure. Keep this in mind as you read this article.
Have you ever told yourself, “This will be the last time I drink,” or “This will be the last time I engage in this behavior”? If you’re like many, the answer is a resounding YES! I’ve made that promise to myself countless times. This phenomenon is the very “mistake” we’ll explore in this article.
Now, let me ask you another question: If you were enjoying a fresh, delicious fruit salad, would you ever say, “This is the last time I eat this salad”? Of course not! Why is that? Because it’s a positive behavior that benefits your health. This brings us to the root of the issue. If we label constructive behaviors as good, then we inevitably label destructive behaviors as bad. This kind of labeling can create significant problems. Let’s delve into why this is detrimental to our journey toward sobriety.
The problem with the label of bad
Before we dive deeper into this phenomenon, I want you to understand that the concepts of good and evil are merely perceptions, not absolute truths. However, these perceptions significantly shape our reality. It’s essential to learn to view everything from a causal perspective. Nothing is inherently good or bad; every behavior has its causes and effects. This mindset allows us to remove judgment from our actions.
Judgment is the core issue when labeling behaviors as bad. Ironically, when you judge a behavior, you’re not just evaluating the action; you’re also judging yourself. Consider how you feel when you say, “I’m bad.” It doesn’t feel great, does it? That’s precisely my point. When you judge your drinking, you judge yourself. This self-judgment breeds feelings of shame and negativity.
By living in a mindset characterized by “I’m bad,” you inadvertently fuel the very drinking habits you wish to change. This is the crux of the problem with statements like, “This will be the last time I drink.” Such declarations foster self-judgment and shame, which only serve to reinforce your drinking habits. If you examine the consciousness scale, you’ll see that shame represents the lowest emotional state you can experience.
Shame is truly the hell within the human experience. It’s an emotion that not only fuels addictive behaviors but also creates a tormenting environment in our consciousness. To achieve a state of sobriety, it’s essential to eliminate shame swiftly and effectively.
Now that we’ve identified this critical problem, what’s the solution?
Solution for judgment
Can now I have to just accept when I drink? Understand this: Accepting and judging are not really decisions that you make, but they are byproducts of something. Byproducts of what? Accepting something is a byproduct of understanding. On the other hand, judging is a byproduct of not understanding. In other words, we get rid of judgment and shame when we learn to understand the root cause of our drinking habit. Understanding creates compassion and acceptance for ourselves and my friend, and that is an environment where sobriety can thrive. Learning to understand why you have a drinking problem is the solution to judgment. If you want to know more about how to understand addiction and why you have the addiction, read these two articles. Article 1 Article 2
Conclusion
Can we make smarter decisions as we approach sobriety? Absolutely! This is the power of integrating new information into your consciousness. In the past, we might have believed that saying, “This will be the last time I drink,” was a positive affirmation. However, we now understand that such statements often reinforce our drinking habits. The real issue lies in the judgment and shame attached to these declarations.
Shame and judgment create an environment in which drinking can thrive. Therefore, we must foster an environment where sobriety can flourish. We achieve this by understanding the underlying reasons for our drinking habits. This understanding is the central idea of this article.
Labeling behaviors with judgment and shame only perpetuates the cycle of drinking. If you can apply this principle to your own journey, it can profoundly impact your path to sobriety. A small principle can lead to significant results.
